Values…What even are those? What does it mean to value honesty, to value kindness, to value flossing every day?
If I asked you to list every single one of your values, chances are it would be seemingly endless; everything from social equality to breakfast foods. If someone asked you, “do you value the ethical treatment of living creatures?” you would likely answer yes. But the question at hand is, what does it really mean to value something? How would I know you valued that, if you hadn’t just flat out told me?
What I’ve learned in my whopping 20 years is that there are 2 different people to every person; there is the person you are and the person you say you are, or the person you would like to be. Our entire lives are spent attempting to close that gap, attempting to push ourselves closer to that ideal self.
Prior to college, never once had I considered the importance of aligning my lifestyle with my values. All through my years, I had been taught the importance of having values and the things that I should value. But nobody ever told me what that entailed. It all looked great on paper, but I didn’t have the substance to back it up.
My first real attempt was 10th grade, when I researched the meat industry. I realized that it was an industry that didn’t align with my values, thus, I became a vegetarian. Now happily vegan, I look back and see that as my first real move towards closing the gap. My freshman year of college I had this professor who taught a critical thinking class. The entire class was focused on sustainability, individuality, self-thinking, and values; He essentially created a class that asked people to take a hard look at themselves in the mirror and ask “Who really am I?” I had never felt so passionate about self-improvement. I began stepping outside of my comfort zone and doing all sorts of things I never would have, all for the sake of aligning my life with my values. I valued independence, so I took myself out to dinner and a movie… alone! I valued working on weaknesses, so I joined an organization that pushed me to be outgoing and conversational. I valued supporting local businesses, so I began going out of my way to always shop and eat local. That class was the real wake up call of what it meant to be an honest person and a good human.
Today, I am a completely different person than I was 2 years ago. Though I value all the same things, I now have substance in my life to show for it. I still have a long way to go, but I feel so much pride and love for the life I live and the person I am. Compliments on my character or my lifestyle mean so much more than they ever did before. My values are now so much more than just words; they have depth and meaning.
As mentioned before, your list of values could go on forever. It’s not easy, creating a life that aligns with every single value every single moment. There are days when I’m whiny or lazy or careless; those days become my fuel to be better. It’s okay to to be different on different days — it’s a constant push and pull. The important thing is that you’re working on it. My hopes in writing this bit is not to make you feel guilty or lazy, but to inspire and empower you to be your best self. As people, we are our own biggest investment, our own personal powerhouse; it’s important to be the best that we can be. It allows us to be better in everything else we do. Go ahead, write a list and think about those values. What are they? What does it mean to live them? And yes, it’s okay to skip flossing every once in awhile.